PARADOXMAGIC

iztarshi:

Inspired by various tumblr posts.

Humans quickly get a reputation among the interplanetry alliance and the reputation is this: when going somewhere dangerous, take a human.

Humans are tough. Humans can last days without food. Humans heal so fast they pierce holes in themselves or inject ink for fun. Humans will walk for days on broken bones in order to make it to safety. Humans will literally cut off bits of themselves if trapped by a disaster.

You would be amazed what humans will do to survive. Or to ensure the survival of others they feel responsible for.

That’s the other thing. Humans pack-bond, and they spill their pack-bonding instincts everywhere. Sure it’s weird when they talk sympathetically to broken spaceships or try to pet every lifeform that scans as non-toxic. It’s even a little weird that just existing in the same place as them for long enough seems to make them care about you. But if you’re hurt, if you’re trapped, if you need someone to fetch help?

You really want a human.

(theo-thornから)

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. Set aside a specific time to think about what is on your mind.

2. Find somewhere you can be quiet and alone, and write down what is bothering you.

3. Allow yourself 20 minutes to think about it – including identifying your feelings, trying to better understand the situation, and thinking through possible ways of dealing with things.

4. Decide to set the problem aside for now, and move on with your day.

5. Any time related thoughts enter your mind say “Stop!” and deliberately distract yourself.

6. Repeat Steps 1-3 at another set 20 minute period in the day. Do not allow yourself to ruminate inbetween these set periods of time.

yungterra:

You want my phone number? It’s useless. The best way to contact me is to fill a human skull with acorns and vigorously shake it into the night. I will hear you eventually.

(santnah-deactivated20171030から)

spook-wolf:

ja-khajay:

MERGE THE LAYER KRONK

W R O N G L A Y E R

WHY DO EVEN HAVE THAT LAYER

(theo-thornから)

ojiisanholic:

facingthewaves:

“I want to speak to a manager,” the middle-aged woman said in her stern I-used-to-be-a-soccer-mom-ten-years-ago voice, looking down at me over the top of her Gucci reading glasses.

A wicked grin split across my face and the gates of Hell opened up behind me, releasing a gust of hot wind that whipped my apron around my body and forced the woman to shield her face. Demons came forth, dancing around in flames with songs of, “She wants to speak to a manager. Did you hear that? She wants to speak to a manager!” before erupting into earsplitting shrieks of laughter, none louder than my own cackling.

I took in the woman’s look of utter horror before my eyes rolled back into my head and I growled,

“I am the manager.”

a thing for one of my favorite posts on this site

(uglyから)